Thursday, February 24, 2011

Just sharing the process here

It's never the experience that's the problem, it's only what you're telling yourself about the experience that can be a problem (Adyashanti). OK, the experience might be pain or weakness or nausea which can be unpleasant, but for me if I just try it on being fully present it's more interesting than it is 'bad'. When I start worrying about what the future might entail or start wishing the experience was other than it is, then it becomes a problem.

I'm an Aries, ok, ruled by Mars. There's a warrior element to my personality. Everything is a battle. There's the feeling that I MUST win, MUST achieve and that i can accomplish that through focused and intense effort. Accepting the way that I am wired rather than trying to fight against it allows it to settle in and then it's not a problem just like some aspect of my body , the way my nose looks, hair loss, isn't a problem when I accept it and just allow it to be the way it is.

With limited time on the dirtball (true for all of us) and given my warrior wiring there's an efforting that arises and an intense desire (based on fear of running out of time) to 'get it' whatever it is, in this case, some level of consciousness perhaps. The little ego thing is so sneaky that it could even turn non efforting into another technique or strategy. Shoot must be time to surrender surrendering. :-)

No comments:

Post a Comment